So let me set this up for ya.....
It was hot, Honeyboo was vacationing courtesy of Baylor All Saints and a blood clot in his leg, when out of my partial paralysis and coma, I was awakened. I had not slept well. Tuesday, I took the Big Eskimo to yet one of many more follow up appointments with THE BOTH..... All was well and he told him to keep on working and by the way it may help seriously if you play a little football this fall..... The Eskimo said REALLY??? Yes from the Both..... ( note Both is short for bothwell...) So we get in the car and I am this and thating to the Eskimo and he gets well I called in reinforcements for help.... I am not certain what changed in a mere 48 hours but something snapped....
So back to my coma like state and my awakening.... I hear the door open and I am thinking it is a 4 legged critters coming to bite at me to go outside. I am rooting around when I hear "MOMMA, you need to make me an appointment for my physical I am gonna do it." HUH??? EXCUSE ME????? I sat straight up with medusa hair and half swollen eyes... Wait child come back here are you sleep walking as you have been known to do and now speaking in your sleep??? Am I having a sleep deprivation nightmare again???? I asked him WHAT???? He replied his response "make me an appointment for my physical today." Ok but please can I have coffee first??? Ok.. Off he goes into the wild blue or as in his case green yonder... Nervously I stare from my phone to the door as if one of the two objects would speak to me and tell my what just happened... Nothing.... So I get up brush my wig and straighten it and walk zombie like to make coffee.. As the coffee was coming, I walked to the end of the house to see if what just happened happened????? I knocked and the eskimo answered...
He said he was gonna do it but well as with the NFL there needed to be uh oh whats the word negotiations perhaps????? Ok so terms then.. Yes that is a nice word... I was still in utter disbelief. I was certain at this point the Blondie or Curly needed to call the men or women with white coats and "happy cookies" to come get me. Either that or hell had frozen over and that could explain the heat here. NO not that lucky. Oh I heard him the third and fifteenth times. Shock I tell you and that is saying it nicely. So I got dressed for work cause some of us have to do that and went. I called the uh wonderful human Dr. Coach Athletic Trainer and advised him. Well ok so I sent him a text asking about the physical form but you understand. Then I called Boths office. Since we had just been in like the day before, the wonderful appointment maker who knows us by now well laughed and said ok see you all Friday. Ok that was easy.
So I called Honeyboo, and it is most likely good he was in a drugged state in the hospital as he may have had a blood clot and heart attack.. I was sure at this point that I was not dreaming but thought I may have had a stroke or my brain was baked from the heat. No he said he is sure honeyboo. I have scheduled his appointment for Friday. Ok have a super day.
So here we are on the eve of official, unofficial practice Monday morning. We have shoes and all that good stuff. Even a supply of gatorjuice for after. Now the only issue is the schedule nazis in the office. I am thinking if I take them donuts that it will ease the blow of having to completely re do his schedule for this school year. I am thinking I will take the donuts and him and stand behind his 6'3 frame all 285 pounds of him and tell them... Maybe when they begin to throw things his chest or head will deflect them from my little noogin..... Well he is not alone dealing with the schedule Nazis, but still it is better to be safe then get brained with a stapler right????
Now the human in me knowing that college is expensive, says oh you better do it, but the loving momma in me who has helped him every step though this is terrified as much as he is. But the tough love momma knows he has to do this not only to help his quality of life and be able to walk normally but to get past the fear of the pain. ( see I am not afraid to admit I have multiple personalities) It frankly sucks. Just like it did when he was a baby knowing those nasty steroid shots to help him breathe were for his own good even though it hurt and the needle well I would rather have had them stick him with a harpoon I tell ya.. Momma will be find and I know he will too.. Just somebody bring me the tissues for the first game cause I may need them.... Well ok we all know I have the loudest mouth out there but you get my point. And oh gimme a blankie cause it might get cold by then....... And for the record, his negoations came out just fine. He got his terms and conditions heard and sort of met. And I have Blondie to thank deeply for this and Curly as soon as he takes him down..... Really, Blondie and he had a brother to brother conversation which I was told that was all I needed to know. Well alrighty then. ( Do not tell them but momma has planted listening devices in their rooms and phones) HAAA HAAAA.
Now, Head Coach little big daddy just needs to buy stock in chocolate chip cookies from Albertsons... Yep this might be a long season if he does not.....
Nighty Nite Nite, smooches......
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Saturday, July 9, 2011
Half a year ALREADY??????????????
So when Honeyboo reads this he will do one of three things- 1. Laugh his bohiney off. 2. CRY. 3. Shoot me...I don't care its funny and sappy..... So just indulge..... and wish me luck....
So on Monday we will have been married half a year. It was pointed out by a good friend last Monday at the 4th party. It has been an "eventful" half year. And although we have not really had a huge blowup, we have had our share of "squabbles." It is getting back to normal and fortunately we have not maimed or harmed each other nor the little people or the Gma but it has gotten loud once maybe twice. Thing is it is normal. Blows have not been exchanged nor objects so I guess we will shall make it the other half the year.
It all started in January on the 11th. Judge Wright who has been on the bench since dirt was invented married us. I was not sure whether to laugh or cry and I actually did both at the same time. I was TERRIFIED not PETRIFIED. She tried to break the ice with jokes but it did not work. Just look at our Wedding photos on Facebook. I look like a scared rabbit. Ok but you understand. I was worried. It was freaking cold verses now with it being freaking hot. The only dress I could find in 25 counties was a sleeveless black number and a shawl... All he could find was a red shirt and khakis and the boys well you know the Eskimo on crutches and all had on shorts. So you see where I am going. WE HAD NOTHING but EACH OTHER. AND LOVE. That is all we need right? Yep that is all we need. So we got hitched and soon after, Honeyboo got sick and at the same time he took a new job. Holy Crap. I thought I was CRAZY, I mean we got married and I started Spring 2011 semester the next day. He took a new job about three weeks after we got married. And the Eskimo went back to school from being off and Blondie suddenly wanted to learn to drive, and Curly wanted to switch schools. WHOOOOOOAAAAAAAAA Nelly hold the batphone I need a break. My head is spinning just writing about it. Some way some how, we have survived. Oh I could tell you that it has been all rainbows, cucumbers, and roses, but along the last half year it has not. I would only be lying and I am not about to start that....
A week ago, Honeyboo managed to make me feel that silly, scared I want to run feeling again with a ditty on FB about why he loves me.. Hummm truth be told, I am not good a verbally communication, I can write it and tell you but somewhere between my squirrel brain and my alligator mouth, translation gets lost and I open to speak and NOTHING happens... It sucks when it does. Mind goes blank the whole kit and caboodle..... I get the beyond the deer in the headlights look.... So you all know me, I typically tell you what I think and how I feel but when you are my betrothed, I lose all sense.
See I love Honeyboo, because he does goofy things that no one else would think funny... For example, one of our first shopping trips out, to CVS, we were waiting on his meds and looking at something I do not even recall and here is why.... Out of the dead silence of the store, he goes as loud as he can, "STOP ARGUING WITH ME NOW!!!!!!!!!" I know for a fact I turned 15 shades of red. He thought it was funny... I however, am still not thinking so much funny as you will pay.. Then a few days later walking out of my favorite store, Kohls, in front of Lake Worth's finest, who had someone pulled over, he grabs my purse from my shoulder and starts walking hurriedly in front of me and saying as loud as he can, "STOP THAT IS MY PURSE LET GO STOP FOLLOWING ME OFFICER SHE IS TRYING TO TAKE MY PURSE." For the love of all things holy, if that officer would have come over there I most likely would have decked Honeyboo. We shall not even discuss the incident at Wal Mart where he dropped back as I was walking out and told the door greeter that she should stop me as I had stuff in my pockets... It is a good thing I no longer can swing a bat.... He might be in trouble.
But he also listens somewhat. I tell him he pretends to be listening to me but I have doubts. Ahhh yes and there is the non confirmed ADD that we both have.. It is fun.... He picks on me about cooking and I pick on him about being lazy... Oh and the little people well they think he is the greatest thing since ice cream was invented. Typically when he is picking at me they join in... So much so that one night I chocked and the Fire Department almost had to be called...
Mostly it is the little things he does that make me love him. Like taking an extra day off work when the Eskimo had his first surgery to help me with him. OR going to the doctor with me cause I am a chicken... In life it is the little things that count not as much as the big things.
So for half a year this Monday, we have done pretty good. Neither of us has lost a limb or been harmed and kids you should not try some of the stuff we try at home, but none the less we have made it.
I love you Honeyboo and when you asked me to marry you I asked you why? Well I married you and yes you tricked me, you told me that we had to go register the car and I can not figure out why gma and the little people and Mel came to this day... Well sweet pooh, WHY DID I MARRY you????? Hmmmmm give me the other half the year to figure it out and I will tell ya.... I LOVE YOU BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
( I really did, He asked me to marry him on my birthday in November, and while he was on one knee, and asked I looked at him and said "WHY?" and then I started crying cause I realized he was serious.....)
Night all smooches and loves.......
So on Monday we will have been married half a year. It was pointed out by a good friend last Monday at the 4th party. It has been an "eventful" half year. And although we have not really had a huge blowup, we have had our share of "squabbles." It is getting back to normal and fortunately we have not maimed or harmed each other nor the little people or the Gma but it has gotten loud once maybe twice. Thing is it is normal. Blows have not been exchanged nor objects so I guess we will shall make it the other half the year.
It all started in January on the 11th. Judge Wright who has been on the bench since dirt was invented married us. I was not sure whether to laugh or cry and I actually did both at the same time. I was TERRIFIED not PETRIFIED. She tried to break the ice with jokes but it did not work. Just look at our Wedding photos on Facebook. I look like a scared rabbit. Ok but you understand. I was worried. It was freaking cold verses now with it being freaking hot. The only dress I could find in 25 counties was a sleeveless black number and a shawl... All he could find was a red shirt and khakis and the boys well you know the Eskimo on crutches and all had on shorts. So you see where I am going. WE HAD NOTHING but EACH OTHER. AND LOVE. That is all we need right? Yep that is all we need. So we got hitched and soon after, Honeyboo got sick and at the same time he took a new job. Holy Crap. I thought I was CRAZY, I mean we got married and I started Spring 2011 semester the next day. He took a new job about three weeks after we got married. And the Eskimo went back to school from being off and Blondie suddenly wanted to learn to drive, and Curly wanted to switch schools. WHOOOOOOAAAAAAAAA Nelly hold the batphone I need a break. My head is spinning just writing about it. Some way some how, we have survived. Oh I could tell you that it has been all rainbows, cucumbers, and roses, but along the last half year it has not. I would only be lying and I am not about to start that....
A week ago, Honeyboo managed to make me feel that silly, scared I want to run feeling again with a ditty on FB about why he loves me.. Hummm truth be told, I am not good a verbally communication, I can write it and tell you but somewhere between my squirrel brain and my alligator mouth, translation gets lost and I open to speak and NOTHING happens... It sucks when it does. Mind goes blank the whole kit and caboodle..... I get the beyond the deer in the headlights look.... So you all know me, I typically tell you what I think and how I feel but when you are my betrothed, I lose all sense.
See I love Honeyboo, because he does goofy things that no one else would think funny... For example, one of our first shopping trips out, to CVS, we were waiting on his meds and looking at something I do not even recall and here is why.... Out of the dead silence of the store, he goes as loud as he can, "STOP ARGUING WITH ME NOW!!!!!!!!!" I know for a fact I turned 15 shades of red. He thought it was funny... I however, am still not thinking so much funny as you will pay.. Then a few days later walking out of my favorite store, Kohls, in front of Lake Worth's finest, who had someone pulled over, he grabs my purse from my shoulder and starts walking hurriedly in front of me and saying as loud as he can, "STOP THAT IS MY PURSE LET GO STOP FOLLOWING ME OFFICER SHE IS TRYING TO TAKE MY PURSE." For the love of all things holy, if that officer would have come over there I most likely would have decked Honeyboo. We shall not even discuss the incident at Wal Mart where he dropped back as I was walking out and told the door greeter that she should stop me as I had stuff in my pockets... It is a good thing I no longer can swing a bat.... He might be in trouble.
But he also listens somewhat. I tell him he pretends to be listening to me but I have doubts. Ahhh yes and there is the non confirmed ADD that we both have.. It is fun.... He picks on me about cooking and I pick on him about being lazy... Oh and the little people well they think he is the greatest thing since ice cream was invented. Typically when he is picking at me they join in... So much so that one night I chocked and the Fire Department almost had to be called...
Mostly it is the little things he does that make me love him. Like taking an extra day off work when the Eskimo had his first surgery to help me with him. OR going to the doctor with me cause I am a chicken... In life it is the little things that count not as much as the big things.
So for half a year this Monday, we have done pretty good. Neither of us has lost a limb or been harmed and kids you should not try some of the stuff we try at home, but none the less we have made it.
I love you Honeyboo and when you asked me to marry you I asked you why? Well I married you and yes you tricked me, you told me that we had to go register the car and I can not figure out why gma and the little people and Mel came to this day... Well sweet pooh, WHY DID I MARRY you????? Hmmmmm give me the other half the year to figure it out and I will tell ya.... I LOVE YOU BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
( I really did, He asked me to marry him on my birthday in November, and while he was on one knee, and asked I looked at him and said "WHY?" and then I started crying cause I realized he was serious.....)
Night all smooches and loves.......
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